There is a great phrase in the recovery communities - of which I am a member - and they call it the “language of the heart. "

How’s that for great, English? It is when we set aside a lot of the superficial things that many of us spend our time in: the small talk and all those things.

When we push past that, and we make real connection with other human beings, it's what Brene Brown refers to as “the space of vulnerability” where we open ourselves up, we let people see who we really are, and what's really going on inside of us. What happens as we do that more and more is this language of the heart thing kicks in.

I recently experienced a moment like this. I had been asked to tell a little bit of my recovery story and there came a moment where I began to cry. I realized that all most of us ever really wanted was to make a real connection with other people ... to be seen for who we are and how we are. One of the beautiful things is when we go into that space, that language of the heart, where we make that connection, the one thing that we were all hoping for all along.

I'm not sure where you might go with the language of the heart, but I do know that you might want to consider working diligently to let go of the various ways we keep ourselves apart, invulnerable, self-protected, and distant.

If it's true that what we're really looking for is genuine, authentic connection, then letting go of all that stuff should be easy.