Where Exactly Are We Going? And How?

“How much of our life’s direction, or choices, are framed and influenced by our past? Nature (genetics) and nurture (environment) play into our free will/agency – either conscious or unconscious? … And then how the rest of our lives play out? … Aren’t these the existential questions with which many of us must deal?”

~ Tiffany

*****

Some years ago, Tiffany was directed to me for professional and leadership coaching. She’s smart, credentialed, driven and successful, though she’d found her way into leadership roles for which she had not previously been well-prepared. As is often the case in my practice, which I invariably describe as psycho-spiritual for lack of a better description, over years of interaction, Tiffany and I have pushed well beyond practical coaching and into human development and potential.

Recently, Tiffany sent me the rhetorical playground that is quoted at the beginning. As sometimes happens, a stream of consciousness followed that was curiously compelling. Following are my thoughts in response to her.

*****

Yes, we clearly are influenced in our “choices” in all kinds of arenas by some strange mix of nature and nurture. Some would say it is for psychic healing purposes, so we may make greater contributions in the world, i.e. the wounded healer archetype.

The magic elixir for us seems to be increasing awareness of what is within and beneath those “choices,” whether in a purely mystical or religious way, or through the depths of our psychology.

The challenge with awareness is that as we see more clearly, and understand more fully, we are engaged by what really can become choices, albeit still with murkiness. (We never fully know what’s really going on, or what strange and curious vantage points from which we are viewing ourselves or our realities!)

Regardless, with awareness comes responsibility according to the wise ones. I explored this in The Way of Spirit in looking to understand how Spirit, or Tao, or Force, or Flow, must be interacting with us. And it seems from my experience that the more aware we become, the greater is access to that Energy, whatever it may be.

Anthony de Mello says in his book, Awareness: The Perils and Opportunities of Reality, we are looking toward Enlightened Self-Interest as the optimal. He would say that is a main point of our growth as beings.

Then there is the idea of “metanoia,” a profound change of heart, which then brings forth all kinds of potentialities. All based on just how clearly we see and understand. An example for many is when through greater awareness and then metanoia, life courses are chosen anew including work, relationships, faith systems, and pretty much anything.

The part that I find most invigorating is that regardless of nature, nurture or fate, somewhere deep down inside us is the means with sufficient consciousness to find destiny no matter what transpires. Not a singular path or destination, but a realization over time.

So we come to the big question for each of us in my assessment: What is blocking us off from the clarity of sight that allows for understanding?

My experience to date demonstrates to me that the unblocking always increases understanding. And greater understanding always leads to greater awareness.

Best of all, these changes within us allow for a transformation of our being. When our being is profoundly changed, it always affects the world around us, invariably in a positive way.

It is a beautiful design. One that seems intended to accelerate our growth and development. As one long-time spiritual teacher would often say when we could see and acknowledge this reality, “Well, glory be!”

Now, let us see what destinies the day brings forth! ~ Ron